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Miscellaneous

Chat with Friends – Waynes World, Keebler Elf, and more…

I would like to introduce a series that highlights some chats I have with my long-time best friend Adam. Below begins the journey.

Categories
Miscellaneous

Talent Exchange Closure

I recently received an email from the Talent Exchange network that I had my resume details posted to for earlier career searches that states the closure of the service. I haven’t used the service in quite some time so this comes as a surprise.

For those interested take a look at the message from Talent Exchange of the closure

Categories
Miscellaneous

What is KC Tea and How to Make It

Well… If you don’t know what KC Tea is, you came to the right place because we are gonna set you right.

KC Tea – Kansas City [Iced] Tea, brought from the great man and rapper Tech N9ne.

To set you straight, first start off with

  1. Hennessy Cognac, you’ll need 2 shots of this
  2. Sprite
  3. Twist a Lemon and if you don’t have any lemon then you can use Lemon and Lime Juice
  4. Be sure to drop some Ice in it too!

There you have it! Real easy and simple to make KC Tea. This thing goes down real easy so watch your drink as you will be caught slippin’ and get drunk real quick.




After a KC Tea or two, I feel rowdy! Careful when drinkin’ this one as you mind get into some shit you wouldn’t normally.

Side Note, I was at a bar in Fremont,CA and some chick and her b/f were drinking on the KC Tea. When I mentioned that they were having KC Tea, they were like … Huh? Indeed, it was KC Tea as they were ordering double shots of Henny with Sprite and a Lemon.

Categories
Miscellaneous

CDC Zombie Preparedness Guide – Zombie Apocalypse

Be Prepared!

If you were wondering about a quick reference guide on what to do in case flesh eating, brain munching dead heads come wandering to your door step, then look no further!

The CDC has a nice, to the point, overview to get you prepared for the outbreak. No, don’t hide yo wife or hide yo kids, there ain’t no rapin’ going on – just good old blood splattering, moaning and groaning fun.



If you're ready for a zombie apocalypse, then you're ready for any emergency. emergency.cdc.gov

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Miscellaneous

2011 Spike TV Scream Awards!

The 2011 annual scream awards presented by Spike TV is an honor to those movies and shows that fall into the Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Comic Books, and Horror categories.

The show will air in October after much feedback from the web world with regards to what kinds of films should be included in the awards session. Such films range from the Batman series to the Twilight series and everything in between!

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Miscellaneous Music

A song to get you in the mood!

I just found out about this song and well all I can say is WOW. If this song does not get you in the mood, you must be impotent or something! I shall post the song but be sure that you have access to sex right away! Enjoy!



Categories
Miscellaneous

SkyDiving Adventure

After weeks of planning to go Skydiving and many failed attempts to check out the company car to get us there, we were finally able to make it over the long holiday weekend of Labor Day.

Check out the video! No need to give long speeches about this/that and the other, get right in!



A Pic of me and the Gang who went SkyDiving

Me and the SkyDiving Crew

Categories
Entertainment Miscellaneous

Im In Love with a STRIPPER!

So the song goes by T-Pain. I was a fiend to the strip clubs for a good section of my adult life, those were the days. Hahaha!




My best friend and I wanted to get out of the house for an evening of fun filled breasts bouncing in our faces and booze creating a stench of bad breath syndrome that would rival that of a sickly homeless person that hasn’t brushed their teeth in weeks and I was all for such an night of action and entertainment.

As I was writing this initially, I had a good thought process of direction to take this posting. Then I let it sit for too long and coming back to it now and re-reading the first paragraph, I thought again; That all my nights which involved strippers begin in this same manner. Though, I digress, lets get this show on the road…

There was one night in particular that we headed over to one of the ‘better’ adult entertainment establishments in our community in order to get our fill of this breasticle action for the better part of the evening.

The night began innocently enough with us getting into the car, making a play for the the bank for some cash to ‘splash’ on these females and a small stop for some grub. After the prep work was done, we headed over to the strip club, parked front and center with prime position by the front door of the club. We get out of the car, head up to the bouncer show ID and were let in without issue…

This is where things get hazy, with the requirement to buy two drinks/haze of smoke/ and friends in tow, I continue the streak of 3, 4, 5, etc. drinks at the club to thoroughly enjoy the evening with my peers and the club full of nekket women bumpin and grindin the pole and people in the audience. After a few drinks and a few passes of different strippers, it seems my buddy is in good with a more than one of the chicks working there – good deal! Since the chicks think that they are good with one friend, they try to play the rests’ emotions for a bigger ‘tip’ for their dances – fat chance when dealing with me!

Stripper: ‘Tip for my dance?’
Me: ‘I didn’t see you dancing.’
She then just moves onto the next person to grind out some cash from them.

Next stripper comes around
Stripper: ‘Tip me for my dance?’
Me: ‘Hm…’
Pull a dollar out of my pocket
Me: ‘Do you have change for a dollar?!’
Stripper: ‘OMG! That is so rude, you are an asshole!’
Me: ‘What? Do you have change for a dollar?!’
Friend: ‘Damn man, you are a jerk. Don’t be a dick to her.’
Me: ‘What? Come on man, I’m just asking for change here!’
Friend: ‘LoL! Aite man, you should apologize, though.’
Me: ‘Eh. Aite man.’

I stroll over to the stripper that I so politely insulted and apologize, then get to joking about with her. She was still a bit pissed at first but, somehow we found a common interest and started talking smack for a bit. I then get her to come back to our place and we continue talking some more. At the end of the night, my friend started joking with me that I made best friends with this chick.

A few weeks later (maybe it was days, I dunno, time runs by me rather quickly :-P) we end up back at this same place and I see the same chick again.

She sees me from the stage and throws me a smile and after the dance comes down and we get to chatting it up again for a bit. If you’ve been to a titalicious bar, then you know the girls can’t linger in one place for long and either need cash or to move to another dude for cash, since I wasn’t putting anything out her and I chat for a bit then she would leave and come back and we would chat some more.

I saw her two times in the strip club but, I’ll tell you… Hell NO! I wouldn’t date a stripper. This video gives some good insight into why;



I’ve had some random experiences at strip clubs, more far fetched than just lap dance and some pole dancing. One example is the titty bar we went to for food because we were hungry late at night, half lost in Fort Lauderdale and the waitress or whatever girl kept flirting with me in an middle school way of teasing/hitting me – no dice titty bar waitress.

Now, Enjoy this little Vimeo stripper clip!


Stripper Skills from urjh on Vimeo.

Categories
Miscellaneous

Working on Redesign

Sorry for the lack of postings recently, I have been on vacation from work and was in Italy for a few days spending some great quality time with a wonderful person.

On that note, once I returned I began tweaking on another project site that Matt and I have been working with since 2001, unfortunately it has consumed much of the rest of my vacation time and I hadn’t gotten around to posting some cool/good stuff here.

The site is always advertised here at the bottom as ShowYourPic.com I will have more details in a future post and give some highlights of this tedious never ending site 🙂

Categories
Amsterdam Miscellaneous Travel

The comments that leave my mouth…Is it any wonder why I’m always quiet

The Barrymore Bomb

Scene: A crowded bar with loud music

**I spot a girl in the bar that looks like she could be a doppelganger for Drew Barrymore**
Me: Hey! You know, you look exactly like Drew Barrymore, it is uncanny!
Her: OMG! I can’t believe you just compared me to Drew Barrymore!! She is so ugly [some incomprehensible text].

**Hmmm… I need a saving grace here. OKAY!**
Me: But magazines and many women think she is really beautiful.
Her: Well, I don’t!

**A back and forth battle royal for me to redeem myself only drives the stake even deeper which lands in the ultimate**
Her: OKAY, you can take your foot out of your mouth now.
Me: Hm. Touche.

Exit: Stage far away but the same place.

The Not So Fly Spanish Fly

Scene: A bar full of pub crawlers

Me: You’re not Hispanic!
Her: Text in Spanish.
Me: Hm. Sure but, still I’m from Miami I have lots of Spanish friends and I can tell for sure! That you are not Hispanic.
Her: More incomprehensible text in Spanish.
Me: OKAY man, whatever, I just know for a fact that you aren’t Spanish. You sound like a true bred white-girl.
Her: What is it!? My accent?
Me: Yes, You sound like you’re from the states full on.
Her: Whatever man. You’re just a hater.
Me: ME! A hater, no way! You just don’t sound Spanish, that’s all I’m saying.
**Lingering conversation with me raggin’ on this girls accent**

**Cycle to later in the night**
Me: Hey, what’s up!?
Her: Get away from me, you were knocking on my accent all night and now you want to say whats up, no way hater.
Me: Eh.

Exit: Red light district

Rush Hour Power Part 1

Scene: A dance club in the city

**OK, I’m going for it, I’ve gotta use that line I heard in Rush Hour 3 before I jet from this place**
Friend: So Marlon… [I didn’t hear word after that, as I became so focused on pouncing this chick with the line, it was like tunnel vision]
Me: Hey man! I’ll be right back, excuse me.

Me: Hi, I know you probably won’t understand a word of what I’m saying but, I think you’re the most beautiful girl in this club tonight.
Her: Thank you but, I think there are other much better looking girls.
Me: Whoa, you speak English. Hm.
Her: Yes and also German and some Spanish, I love Spanish the most.
Me: Cool man, I’m from Miami, lots of Spanish speakers there. I do need to learn some German though.
**She had some text on Deutsch I won’t mention**

**Fast-forward some time later**
Me: Hey, we are going to take off, we should exchange numbers.
Her: No…
Me: Huh? Aw, come on.
Her: No…

Exit: To mi casa.

Rush Hour Power Part 2

Continuing my streak of excellence in the realm of reciting bad pickup lines from movies, I endured further to complete what I have learned.

Scene: A grand scale outdoor techno party, complete with dirt/sand and great weather

Me: Hey buddy, I think this chick over there is like eyeballing me and is going to come over…
Her: Hi! [some text in German]
Me: Hey! Do you speak English?
**With a grand British accent**
Her: Yes, I do. How are you?
Me: Im doing fine and you?

**Small talk, yada yada, which turns into me wanting to spurt my random though**
Me: I just wanna pour honey all over your body and lick it off.
Her: But, then I will be all sticky!
Me: Yea, that’s why I’ll lick it off.

^^This conversation surprising ran longer than I expected^^

Exit: Dirt trail to civilization (why conform, hell yes I still use ‘z’ instead of ‘s’, suck it!)